Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I miss my Cows...

The current state of the economy has taken a dire turn for the worst.... The cows are out in pasture but I am being denied my right to bark at them! I am thinking of running away from home, declaring SheyFey an unfit mom, or having her sent away to the penitentiary! The price of gas, the rate of inflation, the stock market downturn, and MOM's lack of fiscal responsibility (she goes to work EVERY day??) have all contributed to this travesty! She is also VERY lazy unless properly motivated by me! Sometimes she will only run me twice a day!

This past summer I would have gone crazy without my R-Man's love and attention!! While mom is sitting at her computer, ignoring my needs, RH comes by and runs me around the block. On Sunday's when mom used to drive me out by the farms, she just lazes about in bed or opens the back door for me to sit and stare at the stinkin' squirrels. I hate squirrels! I want COWS!! Cows are my passion.... I can line 'em up, herd 'em up, and tell them what to do! They are my slaves and I am their master. What a power trip! Stinkin' squirrels just sit up in their trees teasing me about how "high" they are and how I couldn't climb a bush let alone a tree.... Stinkin' squirrels.

Somebody call mom and tell her to shape up or I'm movin' two blocks down!

Let me tell you about this guy... R-Man is the bomb! Even when he is hurtin' and tuckered out, he will find the strength and spend the time to take me for a walk. Sometimes he tortures me, makes me beg and whine, by taking extra care to put on shoes and tie them.... jeesh that takes forever!!! When he has to put on a coat or grab his phone I practically hit the roof! How much time does it take to get ready for a quickie around the block!!!!!! Sometimes I even have to SAY "out" to make him understand how much I need him to move quickly!

After we get out the door, I fly down the alley or run to poo in the neighbors yard, depending on which route he seems to be taking. I can read him like a book! I like to stay way ahead of him where the air is freshest. He don't mind, he makes funny noises at me like trot, trot, trot... I think he wants to be a horsie! Crazy humans! Wait is his favorite word. He like to say it at the street corner's like I am going to beat him across the street or somethin'.... Duh! I am as fast as the wind and he ain't!

When we get home, I know I have tired him out. He collapses on the couch and slips off his tennie's. The smell of his feet wafting over my nose.... mmmmmhh What a great way to end the walk! I wish mom's feet could smell warm like his! She don't wear socks too much though.

Well, I best get off the computer now. Mom will be getting home for lunch in a couple of hours and if I turn off the laptop now, it will be cooled down by the time she gets home. I want to surprise her with this blog. Sometimes she forgets how much I can really accomplish!